Pacific Rim Old Year Road Action

I was trying to find how the New Year was going, as it arrived out east, but their obviously too busy enjoying themselves to update their news sites.

However, Papua New Guinea has narrowly averted mourning the Great Potato Avalanche of 2007!

Meanwhile, down under nothing gets past the Australian Police Force, certainly not a Bridal Drag Racing Vehicle! I guess that couple were REALLY eager to get on with the conjugal rights!

HNY! We'll be watching London's celebrations from high-ground, away from the crowds.

Revenge Is Dish Best Served Cold

And so, in the globally warmed mildness which is now the English winter, we walk to Highgate Woods, and I have my usual regret in not having a dog to walk. (It would also sort out the cat problem at home).

As we walked by the park benches, we casually glanced upon the plaques mounted upon each, commemorating the deceased loved ones who had once frequented the woods, and apparently enjoyed their time there.

This set me thinking. Why just commemorate the loved?

Why can't we use the dog-shit containers to berate the loathed?

"Sid Guts: an odious little sod who never threw the ball back over the fence, unless he'd punctured it first"

"Cynthia Sudbury: an appauling snob, and hypocrite; rest in hell bitch"

"Vince Wilkins: the local burgular and all-round prick: I'm glad you fell off the ladder, you git!".

That sort of thing.

Cat In Vinyl Disruption Incident.

So she says, "They'll be alright on their own over Christmas, it's only one night, what could possibly happen?"

My examination has reached the conclusion that a large, male feline, entered the case via the Albums (between Phil Manzenera's Lagrima and -pre Roxy- Quiet Sun) , and eventually exited via the Singles (mainly 1976 to 1978). Fortunately, my mint Teenage Kicks (original pressing on Good Vibrations including newspaper wrap) survives.

The prime subject has demonstrated a typical indifference. At least a dog would KNOW it's guilt.

De Hitler Hond!

Ya! Tonight we're reading Dutch!
I can't actually find the button to convert the Dutch into English, but it looks intriguing all the same.
Check out Adolf de hond in De Telegraaf

What I Want For Christmas

If I was young and rich,
I'd have a rock 'n' roll band,
and stand at the front playing this! 

From  Pheo Guitars as seen
at Destroy All Guitars

Perfidous Pigeonry!

Well, it seems that after all the bad press, those pigeons are going for respectability by taking part in the reopening of an East London cemetery dedicated to the animal kingdom's war dead.

As part of the ceremony, the pigeons have wangled themselves a role by providing a Pigeon Fly Past!

Ah! But what's this? On the same day, the BBC reports on a seemingly affable dog story, and how a voracious pooch almost ruined a Northern Pie Eating contest. However, on closer inspection, it transpires that the dog was in cahoots with a Decoy Pigeon!

Oh yes, no medal for those two!

Medieval Helpdesk

Yes, it's new technology!

Tornado Warning

Sorry to bring this to the table, but the news that an elderly man has been censured from farting in his local club is a lazy blogger's golddust.

I Feel Like A Gnu Man

If the British Press is to believed, the country is obsessed with the reappearance of the "Canoe Man", who, having faked his own death, has apparently been off around the world with his conniving wife spending other people's money. And now he has chosen to return home, only to face arrest. This is almost certainly because, as a debtor, a) he has spent all the ill-gotten gains, and b) he probably needs free health care unavailable in Panama.

My only opinion is that it would be a better story had he been known as the Gnu Man, who was last seen alive going out on his Gnu, never to be seen again, with his Gnu turning up unaccompanied several days later, found nibbling the hard shoulder of the Doncaster by-pass.

Or, if the Press would take a more robust approach to relating the tale. Try this:

"Mr Darwin, having settled in South America, managed to keep his guilty secret to himself. He had always enjoyed the company of sailors, and liked to hang around the quayside, where he purchased a new canoe.
"There was only one thing he loved more than that canoe" confessed a friend "and that was to take it up the Orinoco!".

You see, you want to know more already.

Hello Darryl

And a big hello to all our readers in Scotlandshire in the north of England!