According to Norwegian newspaper Aftenposten:
"A Norwegian who thought he'd be spending a quiet weekend at his cabin near Kongsvinger ended up battling an angry moose with the first weapon that came to mind - his slipper"
Read more here
Frankly, I suspect Shiba the dog may not be quite the innocent party portrayed.
Meanwhile, check out the "Related Stories". It seems that Norway has a moose epidemic that they're keeping quiet about.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Joe Queenan: American Patriot
Having seen Borat this weekend I have to say I was impressed. I found some of it unnecessarily cruel, most of it painful to watch, but in all very funny.
Admittedly, taking Americans for a ride is like shooting fish in a barrel, but somebody has to do it. Think of it as getting even in a benign way, as it's surely better to address the inbalance of American power in the world by laughing at them, rather than resorting to mindless terrorism. (In Baron Cohen's case, it's certainly proven to be more lucrative).
This is not appreciated by American "film critic" Joe Queenan in the Guardian, who went all Uncle Sam on behalf of his compatriots, but quite incorrectly, as I will attempt to explain.
Firstly, British humour can be vindictive and cruel. It's part of our sang froid.
Queenan makes the mistake by suggesting Baron Cohen's humour is somehow inspired by a distaste for America, ignoring the fact that it was sharpened on British targets for the previous fifteen years. We've seen all these jokes before.
Yes, it's called taking the piss, and it's what we do, and it's something that's developed into something dark in recent years as Cohen and his contemporaries— Chris Morris, Dom Jolly, Paul Whitehouse, Charlie Higson, and ultimately Cohen's replacement on the Eleven O'Clock Show, Ricky Gervais—have explored as they question the boundaries of humour, blur the lines into tragedy.
I'm sorry Joe, we're not all Michael Palin, who you probably despise as well.
Most troubling is Queenan's patriotic kneejerk reference to the war:
"Baron Cohen is just another English public school boy who hates Americans. It is fine to hate Americans; it is one of Europe's oldest traditions. But the men who flew the bombing raids over Berlin and the men who died at Omaha Beach and the women who built the Flying Fortresses and Sherman tanks that helped defeat Hitler are the very same people that Baron Cohen pisses all over in Borat. A lot of folks named Cohen would not even be here making anti-American movies if it were not for the hayseeds he despises."
American won the war? Tell that to the Red Army. (And by the way, those Americans saw their GDP double as a result of the war: everybody else had rationing: don't ask us to thank you Joe).
Furthermore:
a) Is it really anti-American to make fun of Americans? Isn't the Dubya's line?
b) "Hayseeds" ? No Joe: VOTERS
c) Anti-Americanism a public school thing? Try the working classes: they fucking hate you.
d) Omaha Beach? The British tend to remember Anzio, where the Americans changed their minds and stayed out at sea, stranding the British vanguard on the shore where they were slaughtered unnecessarily. America's status as an untrustworthy ally is as much a staple of Britain's war myth as the cliche of Italian tanks reverse gears. (So much so in fact, that this distrust remains amongst British troops in Iraq (see the end of this report)
Does Queenan really defend those misogynistic fraternity wankers that Cohen meets, those rich kids who will one day run America? Is it not true that your President STILL behaves like that?
I'm sorry, but "Queen Anne" is so far off the mark on this one, that his patriotic little tantrum pisses away any credibility that he had, with his paper-thin sensitivity undermining his pretence of the being the hard-boiled world-weary New Yorker he would so love to be. And I bet he thinks he's Irish!
Cohen IS lazy, and America is an easy target, but don't try to use this film as an opportunity to knock the British, as your prejudices are clearly founded upon your own misunderstanding of what British humour is about.
It's non-aspirational character-based vindictiveness. It's about vulnerability and unfulfilment, whether that's David Brent in the Office or some sad real person who thinks they can get ahead by hiring a "humor coach". Cruel? Yes. Funny? Of course. British comedy is about watching the pompous spiking their own balloon. But I don't have to explain Pomposity to Queenan!
Fly your flag up your ass Joe. We'd probably laugh.
Admittedly, taking Americans for a ride is like shooting fish in a barrel, but somebody has to do it. Think of it as getting even in a benign way, as it's surely better to address the inbalance of American power in the world by laughing at them, rather than resorting to mindless terrorism. (In Baron Cohen's case, it's certainly proven to be more lucrative).
This is not appreciated by American "film critic" Joe Queenan in the Guardian, who went all Uncle Sam on behalf of his compatriots, but quite incorrectly, as I will attempt to explain.
Firstly, British humour can be vindictive and cruel. It's part of our sang froid.
Queenan makes the mistake by suggesting Baron Cohen's humour is somehow inspired by a distaste for America, ignoring the fact that it was sharpened on British targets for the previous fifteen years. We've seen all these jokes before.
Yes, it's called taking the piss, and it's what we do, and it's something that's developed into something dark in recent years as Cohen and his contemporaries— Chris Morris, Dom Jolly, Paul Whitehouse, Charlie Higson, and ultimately Cohen's replacement on the Eleven O'Clock Show, Ricky Gervais—have explored as they question the boundaries of humour, blur the lines into tragedy.
I'm sorry Joe, we're not all Michael Palin, who you probably despise as well.
Most troubling is Queenan's patriotic kneejerk reference to the war:
"Baron Cohen is just another English public school boy who hates Americans. It is fine to hate Americans; it is one of Europe's oldest traditions. But the men who flew the bombing raids over Berlin and the men who died at Omaha Beach and the women who built the Flying Fortresses and Sherman tanks that helped defeat Hitler are the very same people that Baron Cohen pisses all over in Borat. A lot of folks named Cohen would not even be here making anti-American movies if it were not for the hayseeds he despises."
American won the war? Tell that to the Red Army. (And by the way, those Americans saw their GDP double as a result of the war: everybody else had rationing: don't ask us to thank you Joe).
Furthermore:
a) Is it really anti-American to make fun of Americans? Isn't the Dubya's line?
b) "Hayseeds" ? No Joe: VOTERS
c) Anti-Americanism a public school thing? Try the working classes: they fucking hate you.
d) Omaha Beach? The British tend to remember Anzio, where the Americans changed their minds and stayed out at sea, stranding the British vanguard on the shore where they were slaughtered unnecessarily. America's status as an untrustworthy ally is as much a staple of Britain's war myth as the cliche of Italian tanks reverse gears. (So much so in fact, that this distrust remains amongst British troops in Iraq (see the end of this report)
Does Queenan really defend those misogynistic fraternity wankers that Cohen meets, those rich kids who will one day run America? Is it not true that your President STILL behaves like that?
I'm sorry, but "Queen Anne" is so far off the mark on this one, that his patriotic little tantrum pisses away any credibility that he had, with his paper-thin sensitivity undermining his pretence of the being the hard-boiled world-weary New Yorker he would so love to be. And I bet he thinks he's Irish!
Cohen IS lazy, and America is an easy target, but don't try to use this film as an opportunity to knock the British, as your prejudices are clearly founded upon your own misunderstanding of what British humour is about.
It's non-aspirational character-based vindictiveness. It's about vulnerability and unfulfilment, whether that's David Brent in the Office or some sad real person who thinks they can get ahead by hiring a "humor coach". Cruel? Yes. Funny? Of course. British comedy is about watching the pompous spiking their own balloon. But I don't have to explain Pomposity to Queenan!
Fly your flag up your ass Joe. We'd probably laugh.
Thursday, November 23, 2006
The Guardian Balks at "Nigger", But Repents!
For the past twenty years or so, The Guardian has steadfastly resisted the asteriskisation of the words Fuck and Cunt, and have always spelt them in full whenever citing the use of those words, being the only British newspaper to do so.
It is therefore surprising and disappointing that today's article in G2 by Joseph Harker covering the Michael Richards' outburst chose to bottle it, and therefore placed the asterisks where igger should be.
No doubt the editor believed that the otherwise steely readership would be taking a fit of the vapours should they see the word nigger spelt in full.
However: on the web-site Dan Glaister's article puts the igger back in.
Were there harsh words, one wonders?
It is therefore surprising and disappointing that today's article in G2 by Joseph Harker covering the Michael Richards' outburst chose to bottle it, and therefore placed the asterisks where igger should be.
No doubt the editor believed that the otherwise steely readership would be taking a fit of the vapours should they see the word nigger spelt in full.
However: on the web-site Dan Glaister's article puts the igger back in.
Were there harsh words, one wonders?
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
The Mohicans: the Monty Python Years
Well, her majesty's been out respecting the ancestors, helped by the remarkably named Bruce "Two Dogs" Bozsum.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Michael Richards Uses the N Bomb: Collateral Damage in Hollywood
Just when Mel Gibson's people thought they could plan ahead, "Seinfeld's Kramer" goes and opens the whole can of worms again, with Mel the jew-bater's name featuring in all the coverage to "add context".
And remember: Castle Rock still have to shift those Seinfeld on DVD units, just before Festivus and all.
I have a sneaky suspicion that the recipient of the "N" word lambasting may well be traumatised by the whole episode and therefore preparing to sue.
And remember: Castle Rock still have to shift those Seinfeld on DVD units, just before Festivus and all.
I have a sneaky suspicion that the recipient of the "N" word lambasting may well be traumatised by the whole episode and therefore preparing to sue.
Monday, November 20, 2006
Xmas Too Early? Try Bulgaria!
As the western Christmas season get under weigh, there's good news for those in despair of the "season creep" that is the yuletide consumer wave, as it threatens to overlap Halloween and heads for late summer: the Bulgarians have commenced their Advent Fasting Programme.
Read about it HERE
Some even forego a bit of slap n tickle in preparation for the Christ Mass.
I bet they don't have to call it "Happy Festival" either.
Read about it HERE
Some even forego a bit of slap n tickle in preparation for the Christ Mass.
I bet they don't have to call it "Happy Festival" either.
Saturday, November 18, 2006
Greek Traditions Update: US Embassy Rioting
Apparently, 17th November is the date that Greek students march against the US Embassy in Athens.
Obviously, it degenerates into "unorthodox wrestling"
Obviously, it degenerates into "unorthodox wrestling"
Beatles Brand Gets Update
So we have a "new" Beatles album.
This is the Stars on 45 debacle all over again!
This is the Stars on 45 debacle all over again!
Friday, November 17, 2006
Why The Guardian is Crap
I suppose I can gauge how old I am by the number of years that I have been bemoaning how the Guardian has gone downhill since it stop being just earnest and chose to be trendy, allowing naive, ill-informed and ill-read nobodies to write twaddle without fact-checking or even questioned by an editor.
Today's niggle—and it is just that and of no more import—is the following comment about U2's court victory in claiming their detritus back from a profiteering former flunkey. The suggestion is made that the tea-cups featured may represent "a revelation that may undermine U2's image as hard living rock stars"
Hard Living? The Milksops of Pop? Does ANYONE think of U2 as anymore than a bunch of sanctimonious parsons, or have I been reading the wrong magazines.
Craig David as a gangster rapper anyone?
Today's niggle—and it is just that and of no more import—is the following comment about U2's court victory in claiming their detritus back from a profiteering former flunkey. The suggestion is made that the tea-cups featured may represent "a revelation that may undermine U2's image as hard living rock stars"
Hard Living? The Milksops of Pop? Does ANYONE think of U2 as anymore than a bunch of sanctimonious parsons, or have I been reading the wrong magazines.
Craig David as a gangster rapper anyone?
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Scandal In Soft Toy Department
I happened across this on a Spanish Spanking Blog (I just stumbled across it OK; don't judge me!), but my espanol isn't good enough to establish whether Manola has some kind of "reenactment" fetish.
Let's hope he put them all in for a spin on the wool cycle afterwards.
Do The Right Thing
And log into Trev's site (to the right) and congratulate him on twenty years in London.
Well Done That Man
Well Done That Man
Friday, November 10, 2006
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Ain't Nothing Like A Dame
I love the fact that the Head of our intelligence service is called Dame Eliza Manningham Buller.
It's like having Lady Penelope back.
I can imagine her preparing for a dinner party. "Let's see; Canapes; Foie Gras; Petit Pois; Gratin Dauphinoise; Glock, extra rounds, all seems OK here. That cheese wire may come in handy."
It's like having Lady Penelope back.
I can imagine her preparing for a dinner party. "Let's see; Canapes; Foie Gras; Petit Pois; Gratin Dauphinoise; Glock, extra rounds, all seems OK here. That cheese wire may come in handy."
The Usual "Firework In Anus" Story
I'm disappointed that the BBC, of all people, have stooped to cover this story:
' Backside firework prank backfires'
Just the sort of thing that gains popularity on the internet.
' Backside firework prank backfires'
Just the sort of thing that gains popularity on the internet.
Evening Standard Billboard: Free Knorr Stir Fry Packet
It's heartening to see that the Standard is prepared to combat injustice in the world.
Although I know nothing about Mr Free Knorr Stir Fry Packet's case, or even where he's been brutally incarcerated, I'd like the Evening Standard know that I'm quite prepared to offer my services as a petition organiser who will not rest until Mr Free Knorr Stir Fry Packet takes that long walk to freedom.
If only I had Jerry Dammer's number.
Although I know nothing about Mr Free Knorr Stir Fry Packet's case, or even where he's been brutally incarcerated, I'd like the Evening Standard know that I'm quite prepared to offer my services as a petition organiser who will not rest until Mr Free Knorr Stir Fry Packet takes that long walk to freedom.
If only I had Jerry Dammer's number.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Saddam's Friend Stands Down
I'm sure Rumsfeld's cause was not helped by all those "Life of Saddam" profiles featured on all the news features which followed the the Baghdad Gopher's death sentence. They ALL included footage from the 1980s of the eager Rumsfeld shaking hands with Saddam, desperate to gain arms sales from the dictator.
Not the kind of publicity one would want in election week.
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Al Qaeda© Accused Outstrips Actual Murderer
I think it's about time Al Qaeda© start to issue ID cards, because I'm finding it difficult to believe that they actually exist.
Is Dhiren Barot REALLY an 'Al Qaeda© operative'? Is he REALLY "a professional terrorist"? That's some CV!
Well, according to the authorities, who handed out a 40 year sentence, this over-ambitious would-be's conspiracy is considered to be a greater crime than that of a real killer, who only got 29 years.
Obviously Borat, sorry, BAROT (he'll have to get used to that in prison), is a shitty little man, who, given the opportunity, would invoke harm, but let's not buy into the scale of this fantasy.
Anyway, make your own mind up, here's the evidence as presented by the MET.
Is Dhiren Barot REALLY an 'Al Qaeda© operative'? Is he REALLY "a professional terrorist"? That's some CV!
Well, according to the authorities, who handed out a 40 year sentence, this over-ambitious would-be's conspiracy is considered to be a greater crime than that of a real killer, who only got 29 years.
Obviously Borat, sorry, BAROT (he'll have to get used to that in prison), is a shitty little man, who, given the opportunity, would invoke harm, but let's not buy into the scale of this fantasy.
Anyway, make your own mind up, here's the evidence as presented by the MET.
A Photograph That I Like
Picture
by
Goran
Tomasevic
Reuters.
An Israeli policeman seen through the shattered window of a bus hit by a hizbullah rocket.
I really liked this image in today's Guardian; although this web-site version is unfortunately cropped and spoils it's impact.
No big theorising on WHY it's a great photo, it just is.
Monday, November 06, 2006
Holy Cow! Scientist Just Has To Play God.
According the BBC, "UK scientists have applied for permission to create embryos by fusing human DNA with cow eggs."
COW EGGS?
Hey, even I know cows don't lay eggs; I think these guys may be working in the wrong field.
Or helping themselves to the proscribed chemicals cabinet.
COW EGGS?
Hey, even I know cows don't lay eggs; I think these guys may be working in the wrong field.
Or helping themselves to the proscribed chemicals cabinet.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Bang! Bang! You're Under Arrest!
So the trigger happy copper who blasted the innocent Jean Charles de Menezes on London's tube has killed again.
In an exclusive interview, our modern day Wyatt Earp spoke briefly to the Shoebox. "I don't know what it is" he told us "but when I see an unarmed man, a red mist descends and I just start blasting away like a crazy feller! I'm not sure if it's the noise, or the smell of cordite I like the most"
Our sources inside the Metropolitan Police inform us that PC "Six-Gun" should have been decommissioned following the tube incident, but no-one wants to be the one to tell him.
"He's ARMED for fuck's sake" confided a colleague.
In an exclusive interview, our modern day Wyatt Earp spoke briefly to the Shoebox. "I don't know what it is" he told us "but when I see an unarmed man, a red mist descends and I just start blasting away like a crazy feller! I'm not sure if it's the noise, or the smell of cordite I like the most"
Our sources inside the Metropolitan Police inform us that PC "Six-Gun" should have been decommissioned following the tube incident, but no-one wants to be the one to tell him.
"He's ARMED for fuck's sake" confided a colleague.
Britain Tops Again: Youth Crime
In a week when the behaviour of Britain's youth gets declared 'the worst in Europe', the focus turns upon the Anti Social Behaviour Orders (or ASBO) handed out by the authorities to miscreants, and how some youth consider it to be 'a badge of honour' .
I think it's an acronym issue. ASBO has caught on as it has the right amount impact, with its long opening vowel, followed by the aspirant consonant, closing with the impact of that B at the end.
a) it's one of the few words our street urchins can pronounce, (most of whom struggle with their own names: what with the spelling their mothers have thought up)
and
b) it sounds a bit rough, in a council, down-market sort of way.
Now would a ne'erdwell be so keen to boast if he/she had been given a "WANKER", "TWAT", or "ARSE"? (I'll leave you to spend time thinking up some clever and amusing words to fit the initials).
Or "BOOBIE".
I doubt it. Especially if the had to wear a big badge (I suggest 5" diameter, bright dayglo yellow) with "Boobie" on it.
Hmmm, I quite like this law enforcement game.
I think it's an acronym issue. ASBO has caught on as it has the right amount impact, with its long opening vowel, followed by the aspirant consonant, closing with the impact of that B at the end.
a) it's one of the few words our street urchins can pronounce, (most of whom struggle with their own names: what with the spelling their mothers have thought up)
and
b) it sounds a bit rough, in a council, down-market sort of way.
Now would a ne'erdwell be so keen to boast if he/she had been given a "WANKER", "TWAT", or "ARSE"? (I'll leave you to spend time thinking up some clever and amusing words to fit the initials).
Or "BOOBIE".
I doubt it. Especially if the had to wear a big badge (I suggest 5" diameter, bright dayglo yellow) with "Boobie" on it.
Hmmm, I quite like this law enforcement game.
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