As you can imagine, listeners have been queueing for my solutions to the latest disturbances across the metropolis.
I have three:
a) snatch squads grab a mere handful of herberts off the street. Rough them up a bit to gain compliance, then dress them in baby doll outfits with crude girly make up and make them recite on camera "I feel pretty!". This footage to be posted on social media as a warning to the others.
b) Identify mobile numbers used in the area at the time and merely text them a summons to the magistrates court the next day. "Failure to do so..."
c) Helicopter Gunships
OK, not too much social inclusion there, but I think more entertaining, and I'm pissed off because the library was closed when I popped in to drop off the weekend's DVD.
So There!
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