You Are Now Free To Move Around The Cabin Naked

For those that may want to know, it is now possible to partake in a NUDE FLIGHT to a naturist colony.

OK, let's stop tittering and think about why this is such a BAD IDEA:

a) Imagine the scene at the metal detector: "Sir, only take your belt off! Sir, I only asked you to take the belt off!

b) Air Conditioning: flights are COLD! You need to stay warm, and you're not going achieve that in bare skin. Also the gentlemen may want to consider the consequences of prolonged cold on "the down-belows", no-one wants to spend the first three days of their dream holiday attempting to undo "shrinkage"

c) How the hell are they all going to get undressed in the confined space of a airplane fuselage, and where are they going to put their clothes? There aren't exactly WARDROBES on board! Are they going to politely take turns as each undresses in the aisle space? How long will that take exactly? Someone's bound to get to the destination still FULLY CLOTHED (albeit with warm testicles), and having to arrive ashamed of their clothedness.

d) Those with an aisle seat will at some point have someone's privates in their face as the overhead locker is accessed by a nudist. What is the protocol for when some bloke needs to rummage in the over-head above your seat? The clothed crotch adjacent to one's face is unpleasant enough, so imagine the horror of facing some sun-withered member close up, just dangling there like an exhumed squirrel!

e) Have they considered the risks involved during turbulence, with the possibility of the flight attendant inadvertantly pouring scolding coffee into one's lap? And does anyone really want to witness the effect of "turbulent jiggling" on the larger ladies?

f) What if they have to evacuate the aircraft on the runway? Does anybody want to see that on the news? And what about the chafing on the escape chute?

No; I don't think they've thought this through at all!

Let's hope that they all remember to bring their towels; otherwise the airline is going to have to BURN the blankets and pillows.

(I think the flaw in the nudist argument was best put by Bernard Bresslaw in "Carry On Camping", when Sid has suggested that they spend their holidays at a nudist camp. "I don't know." says Bresslaw. "When I go on holiday I like to relax. And when I relax, I like to put my hands in my pocket. How am I going to do that with no pockets to put 'em in?")