Starcrossed Young Love: Exclusive!

Doggone Jumpers

Briefly, a couple that are making clothing from Dead Dog Hair!

Yes, the hair of a dead dog!

It's what Rover would have wanted.

Really Classy Retail Outlet

There is much guff expounded about how Sandbanks in Poole is now the world's 4th most expensive piece of real estate, behind Singapore; Hong Kong & Manhattan.

As you can see, it's not exactly 5th Avenue as the above shop above attests.

Basically, this store has retained its likeably sand-blown shabbiness; little different since John Lennon bought his fags there 40yrs ago.

Once an English sea-side resort; always and English sea-side resort.

Beverly Hills it aint.

What Does It All Mean?

On approaching a course assignment, I address the lecture notes scribbled in my notebook.

Then, at the bottom of one page I have written

1968 1984. 1986 &rarr 1992 6yrs

I have NO idea why.

(Why has 1984 been underlined and given a full stop?)

Answers on a postcard please.

Balkan Bear Accused in Hive Honey Heist

Remember how, not so long ago the people of the Former Yugoslavia decided to revert to their medieval default position of slaughtering each other because no-one likes the villagers down the road.

Well, get out the flaming torches because there's a bear on the loose, and he's got a sweet tooth.

Some wag has the Bear Faced Cheek to take the furry feller to court!

No; Really!

Tesco Robot Dirty Talk Scandal

Now that Tesco are encouraging shoppers to process their own shopping, we have to follow the instructions of the Robot in order to pay for our goods.

They have a least chosen the voice of a passive, well mannered middle class woman.

Earlier today, I had successfully mastered the process when the console next to me announced:

"Unexpected Item In Bagging Area!"

Yes, well, we've all had that dear, but some of us keep it to ourselves!

Really!

Koren Chick Hitches Lift Into Space

And it looks like she's taking her surfboard with her!







Just imagine, there you are at a party, and your eye meets that of Yi So-yeon, and you move towards her, eager to impress her about how you're expecting to collect a ton from selling your old Viz comics on Ebay.

As an opener, you politely ask:

"So what do you do little lady?"

To which she replies:

"Actually, I'm an astronaut!"

Yes, your penis could not be smaller as you make your excuses and hurry to the kitchen before she renders you sterile with a guffaw!